Size Matters? Poppycock!

“Size matters” and ‘Bigger is better” are perhaps the two most harmful phrases ever invented when it comes to wondering about willies. Google searches indicate that penis size is far more important to men than it is to women. For every search women make about a partner’s phallus, men make roughly 170 searches about their own. In addition, women’s concerns about penis size are often the opposite of what men fear, as more than 40 percent of complaints about a partner’s penis size say that it’s too big!

“Men Google more questions about their sexual organ than any other body part: more than about their lungs, liver, feet, ears, nose, throat and brain combined,” writes Seth Stephens-Davidowitz in his book, “Everybody Lies: Big Data, New Data, and What the Internet Can Tell Us About Who We Really Are

But there is another book, this time by Alberto Moravia titled The Two of Us written in 1972, that proves that size is very much on the mind of most men. In this novel the hero, Frederico, is continually in conflict with and forced into embarrassing situations by his gigantic and demanding phallus, which he calls ‘Frederico Rex’. The novel’s title is apt. After all – I know many men who’s ‘phallus’ is very much in control of them and not the other way around; and like Frederico they can glorify it one minute and be ashamed of it the next.

Moravia’s novel not only expresses some of the truths about male sexuality, but also contributed to the propagation of one of its commonest myths; that size equates to virility, and that the bigger the penis, the more satisfying a woman finds it. It really is only men that seem to worry about that – after all that’s why Moravia’s central character has a phallus of extra-ordinary proportions. In a recent collaboration ‘Am I Normal?’ study between King’s College London and the NHS it was found that 85% of women are happy with their partner’s penis size.

Ironically there are big variations in penis size – but the smaller penis extends itself more in erection than the larger one does. Most guys have glanced enviously at their team mate in the after-match showers, who seems to have an appendage dangling halfway to his knees – clearly it doesn’t grow to two feet in length when it gets excited!  The Masters and Johnson research team, composed of William H. Masters and Virginia E. Johnson, pioneered research into the nature of human sexual response and the diagnosis and treatment of sexual disorders and dysfunctions from 1957 until the 1990s. Their book Human Sexual Response is the Bible of the Sex Revolution of the 1960s, to such an extent that one cannot say whether it caused the Sex Revolution or the Sex Revolution led to the creation of the book. As part of their research they did a study into the penises of 300 men. They found that the largest one measured 5.5 inches, and the smallest was 2.25 inches. The former belonged to a slim and fairly short man and the latter to a heavily built and quite tall man. In fact – you might like to know that 4.59 inches (11.6cm) is the average girth when erect and 3.61 inches (9.2cm) is the average length when flaccid. And if you’d like a more modern idea of sizes, go visit Iceland’s Penis Museum!

Average modern dimensions dictate that penises are averagely 6 inches when erect. The measurements (just in case you need to test it out) are taken from the root of the organ on the side nearest the stomach – push back any chubby bits – right down to the end of the foreskin if it protrudes. However – I have most certainly seen a few bigger than that in my time – but that’s another story.

There is a common obsession with length, but actually girth and shape matter much more – as well as the skill of the user. The wand works best in the hands of a good magician! We are all designed differently, and given the effects of age and childbirth, a girthy cock with a good monkey’s fist on the end may well work better than a younger man’s skinny rapier. There’s another thing – what works perfectly for one couple may simply not quite fit the bill if you slip the key into a different lock. It’s all a learning curve. And talking of curved, many are! This can be a positive benefit when there’s a particular spot that you’d like to tickle, and some positions will produce better results than others.

Should we talk about the penis without mentioning the bag of tricks that hangs down below? These are just as varied – from a great pair of plums to an almost invisible bump. Yet again, the size and shape simply do not matter – so long as they work for you and your partner! Nor do the biggest balls produce the most semen.

Finally, in most animals the penis retracts into the body when not in use, and in many its structure includes a penile bone. But it is not the case in man. Instead of a bone to ensure firmness, man has a spongy network of blood vessels. When sexual arousal occurs the blood vessels become distended and the muscles around the veins contract preventing the blood from leaving. It is this congestion of the tissue with blood that causes the penis to become erect – and personally ladies – I think you’d agree that there is nothing like the feeling of an aroused cock in your hand.

So the message? Don’t stress about the size! A woman’s most sexually sensitive places are not deep, deep inside her body. A small cock can satisfy her just as much as a big one – and as the same place is built to extend to allow a baby to pass through – a big cock isn’t going to struggle either. The only thing that a well-endowed man should remember is that a woman’s body is designed to be slowly aroused, so he shouldn’t introduce himself prematurely or roughly. Trust us gentlemen – it won’t do either of you any favours.